Copycats

This candy is, by general consensus, THE BEST THING IN THE WORLD. I'm not making this up. That's what people call it. We call it copycats because it's like a Snickers...but so much better, you'll never want a Snickers again. It takes a while to make, but it makes a metric ton (thereabouts), so unless you throw really big parties, you'll have some on hand for a while. AND without further ado, here is the recipe for Copycats.

Ingredients for layer one:

• 2 tsp butter
• 1 cup milk chocolate chips
• 1/4 cup butterscotch chips (the secret ingredient - you can't really tell they're in there, but you can definitely tell if they're not)
• 1/4 cups creamy peanut butter

Melt everything in a microwave-safe bowl, or on the stove over low heat if you want to be old school. Line a 13 X 9 pan with foil; spray with cooking spray. Pour in the chocolate mixture, spread evenly, and refrigerate until set (about 30 minutes).

Ingredients for nougat layer:

• 1/4 cup butter
• 1 cup sugar
• 1/4 cup evaporated milk (we used cream to no ill effects)
• 1 1/2 cups marshmallow creme (one regular sized jar)
• 1/4 cup creamy peanut butter
• 1 tsp vanilla extract
• 1 1/2 cups salted peanuts, chopped or whole or whatever

This time you will need the stove. Melt the butter over medium heat. Add the milk and sugar and bring to a gentle boil. Reduce to medium-low and stir for five minutes, then take it off the heat. Stir in the jar of marshmallow creme, the peanut butter, and the vanilla. Add the peanuts. Spread over the chocolate layer in the pan. Admire how lovely and candylike it is. Refrigerate until set.

Ingredients for the caramel layer:

• 1 package of caramels. Yes, I know this sounds like cheating. It is. That's okay.
• 1/4 cup heavy whipping cream

Important first step: unwrap the caramels. Have a spontaneous caramel-shelling party. It won't take long, I promise. Combine the caramels and cream in a saucepan and stir over low heat until smooth. Keep stirring for a few more minutes, but don't let it boil! If it boils, your caramel layer will become caramel brittle and will crack teeth. If this does happen though, all is not lost. You'll just have to always let the candy sit to room temperature before eating.

Spread in pan. Refrigerate until set. Cue broken record.

Ingredients for the Fourth and Final Layer:

• 1 cup milk chocolate chips
• 1/4 cup butterscotch chips
• 1/4 cup creamy peanut butter

Home stretch now, folks. Melt these ingredients in any way you see fit (microwave? stove? interior of your car on a summer day?), spread over the caramel layer, and refrigerate for at least four hours.

And now your candy is ready.

You'll want to keep it refrigerated, but take it out at least thirty minutes before you intend to eat it because otherwise cutting it will be murder. For you and the candy. Cut into tiny tiny squares because it is SUPER RICH and besides, that way you can eat more pieces and count them like treasure.

Share with your friends. Share with your enemies, and they shall become your friends.

Devil's Food Chocolate Cake

I've been searching lately for the perfect chocolate cake, and I think this may be it. It's dark and moist and tender and just dense enough. It goes great with homemade cream cheese frosting.

Ingredients:

• 3 oz unsweetened chocolate
• 1 1/3 cup flour
• 3/4 tsp baking soda
• 1/2 tsp salt
• Six tbsp unsalted butter (unless you're like me and never have the stuff around the house. I used salted and cut back the 1/2 tsp of salt just slightly)
• 3/4 cup boiling water
• 1 1/2 c sugar
• 6 tbsp sour cream or buttermilk
• 2 large eggs

Combine flour and baking soda in a small mixing bowl. In a larger bowl, melt the chocolate. Add the butter, cut into six pieces, then the boiling water. Stir until the butter is all melted, then whisk in the sugar and the sour cream, then the flour mixture, then the eggs.

Pour into two 9" cake pans lined with greased parchment paper or, if your cake pans have suddenly and inexplicably disappeared off the the face of the earth, pour it all into a 13"x9" pan and make a sheet cake. Bake for about 30 minutes at 350, until a toothpick inserted in the middle comes away clean.

Wilted Spinach Salad

This is my new favorite salad. It's a combination of something my mom made once, something I found on the internet, and something I largely improvised.

Ingredients for four small or two large salads:

• 4 slices of bacon
• 2 tbsp bacon grease reserved from said bacon
• 2 tsp sugar
• 1 tbsp Balsamic vinegar
• salt and pepper
• spinach or spring mix
• Stuff for your salad (I used black olives and sliced red bell pepper)

Cook the bacon until good and crunchy and reserve the 2 tbsp of grease. Crumble the bacon to be used on the salad. Make the dressing by combining the bacon grease, the sugar, the salt and pepper, and the vinegar. Zap it in the microwave until it's boiling, then pour it over the salad and serve immediately.